Synchronization of Us

How could i not have blogged about this already? Im amazed at how quickly time is passing these days, is the end of pregnancy not suppose to drag?

Yesterday was Rebecca’s hospital check up, she was taken in the morning and put under anesthetic again . The done whats know as a MLB and applied Mitomycin C to stop scar tissue forming.
We spent the afternoon is the hospital but thankfully she was sent home in the evening.

Doctor K was very happy with how she is healing, as he explained it before the surgery in June her airway was about 1/4 the size of what you would expect. Its now about half the size , he doesn’t feel he is going to be able to get it any better and for the moment nothing else can or will be done (which is good news, Rebecca may never be able to scream across a crowded room or become an opera singer but she will be able to live a perfectly normal and happy life) .
She will go back in a few months to see him in the airway clinic and i imagine a few appointments will follow in the future but as long as there not surgical we can all deal. She will also more than likely need some specialist speech therapy help but for the moment nothing will be done till her body gets time to heal and repair.

It looks like we are able to close the chapter of our lives now, its been a horrible and difficult time but with the support of my family and friends (and yes i mean all you guys , i count you all as friends and your support has meant everything to me these past weeks) we have got through it. Now we have nothing but good to look forward to - our son is due in just over 2 weeks , Rebecca is loving nursery and Eilidh will be starting playgroup herself soon. There is nothing but wonderful times ahead for my family.

Lets see - this week for the first time Eilidh told me she loved me unprompted . She just came and and cuddled up to me and went “love you mummy” . Its the first time either of my kids have ever done that and it was amazing.

She has also for some reason started calling her sister “Nay - Nay” . We think it comes from how Rebecca says Eilidh which sounds similar. After allher sister uses a name other than her name so she is just copying. So basically Eilidh is calling Rebecca Eilidh . Its actually rather cute.

She has also discovered that head diving of my bed is *great* fun , we are just waiting for our first hospital trip.

She has also been discovering her artistic side, it sounds terrible but we have always kept art activities to when she was sleeping as previous attempts have always resulted in her eating the crayons/paint whatever. At the hospital she spent ages in one of the playrooms coloring and since
then asks for it all the time and spends ages drawing and painting - although she does seem to lack a little in the imagination department as she is all about drawing circles - over and over and over again.

These were taken on the Sunday after she came off the vent and it was the first day we really felt we had “Rebecca” back .Before then she was refusing to move around and was pretty miserable, she actually got to get of the ward for a short while and join my family for lunch and then played in the playroom for hours with her cousin and sister. I can barely look at these pictures without feeling tearful and so grateful.

No need to password protect these ones i feel. A few taken the first day or to on the ward, she is just coming off the drugs and getting back to normal. The sleeping one was taken on that horrible day she spent hallucinating and going through withdrawal - she had not slept in days and finally passed out.

Some shots of Courtney and Eilidh from my mums when Rebecca was in hospital. The bubble machine is *way* cool and works wonderfully .

Its official, as of today Rebecca is now at nursery - or pre-school as my overseas readers would proberly know it as.
From Monday to Friday from 1 - 3.30pm she will be there. I just cannot believe she is old enough for it, i remember clearly when Courtney started and now she is in her 2nd year of primary school .

It was a much easier start that i was expecting, we went in and as i was filling in paperwork she made her way over to the other children. She played happily with them at the sand table and when i went to leave she kissed me and said goodbye.
Could it really be this easy? This is from the child who has not let either Dh or myself out her sight since she got home from the hospital. I know how wonderful nursery is for them and for a child like Rebecca how many benefits it has , part of me still wishes i could keep her home. Spent to long without her lately .

She only stays for an hour today so its time to go and get her already, will hopefully get around to posting some pictures later if i get the time .

In list form so i can try and keep it short

Had a scan yesterday and a check up today, was my first anti-natal in about 2 months or so due to everything going on. Just 3 more days till i hit the full term mark.

Scan

- Confirmed it was still a baby boy, nice to get the doubly sure before getting rid of all the girls stuff
- Baby looks completely healthy and fluids levels are “average” (which is perfect as the first sign of problems such as Rebecca’s is fluid problems)
- He is head down , hanging just above my pelvis.
- Baby is measuring slightly above average at this stage weighing about 3000g (6.6lb) and overall just measuring a little bigger for dates. Not a big deal as even if i went another 5 weeks gaining the standard 1/2lb a week you would only be talking about 9lbs which is hardly a big deal.

Left that feeling happy and excited.

Anti-Natal - guess it was a 36 week check up.

- Blood pressure was 100/70
- Measured in at 37cm exactly
- Heartbeat was between 140-150bpm and baby is not engaged yet (not really shocked as neither girl
engaged before labour)
- More bloods taken
- Gave her my Birth Plan, she quickly read over it and seemed happy with it. I was really expecting her to pick on some of my plans. She has taken it though to read over alone.
- Talked about the midwifes and plans, they will be on call from 6th September for me (If i go before then i still plan to go ahead with my plans, they must provide a midwife no matter how far along i am. I think i would go in before 38 weeks though)
- Going to have another appointment next week to do all the paperwork and arrange home visits ,basically finalize everything
- Surprised me by saying if i went overdue they would offer me induction at 10+ then 14+ and if i wanted to refuse they would support me if i agreed to regular check ups.

So thats , that . Baby is doing well and everything is going along nicely . Im still waiting for the “fight” to happen, everything seems to easy arranging this homebirth.
Cannot wait till the first to pick up my birth pool

Written with much help from Homebirth.org

In General:

Ideally, if all goes smoothly, I hope that the midwife who attends me in labour will remain in the background, taking observations to check on the baby’s and my safety, but otherwise not getting involved in my labour, unless I request otherwise. I believe that I know how to give birth on my own, but appreciate the security of having a midwife there to help with the unexpected or emergency situations.

The labour:

I would like to remain active and use whatever position I find comfortable. Please encourage me to stay off my back!

I may wish to move throughout the house.

I would like to avoid internal examinations if possible

Please do not offer to break my waters, and if an internal examination does take place please be very careful to avoid breaking it.

If the baby appears to be poorly positioned or labour is not progressing well for some reason, I would appreciate it if you could suggest changes of position or movements which might help.

I would like to have music playing during the labour

Birth Companions

The following people may come to my home during the labour or birth:

My husband Craig

Birth Pool:

I have booked a birth pool and will use it if it helps me.

It is important that the pool temperature is comfortable for me so, unless it is outside normal safety limits, I will choose the temperature myself. I understand that I would probably want a cooler temperature during the first stage of labour, and warmer - nearer blood temperature perhaps - for the second stage.

I would like to have a water birth if possible and would appreciate your support in encouraging me to give birth underwater.

Pain relief:

I hope to manage using no drugs for pain relief, and would appreciate your encouragement to use other methods. For example, I might use movement, massage, relaxation, a TENS machine, or a birth pool.

The birth:

I do not wish to have an internal examination to confirm whether or not I am ‘ready’ to push. I shall only push when I physically cannot do otherwise! If there is any reason to suspect that I might have a premature pushing urge then I would like to discuss this on the day.

Please keep the room as quiet as possible during the second stage. I would like to minimise distractions at this time. If you need to discuss matters with the second midwife, please could you do so very quietly and preferably out of earshot!

I would like to give birth in my birth pool

I would like to give birth in an upright, kneeling, supported squatting or all-fours position to give the baby maximum space to descend through my pelvis. I do not want to be on my back or semi-reclining unless that position seems right for me on the day, having tried alternatives. If I am too tired to maintain an upright position then please encourage me to lie on my side instead of my back, to allow maximum mobility in my pelvis.

I intend to ‘catch’ my own baby, and would prefer the midwife not to touch at all unless there is a problem. I would like the midwife to observe and to be on hand in case of emergency, but otherwise I want to be left to give birth entirely under my own guidance.

I would rather not be told how to push, or guided in the second stage, unless there is a particular reason to suppose that I need assistance, or unless I ask for assistance.

I would like the lights dimmed when my baby is born, and for the minimum amount of noise to be made. I hope that it will be a gentle entry into the world.

Third Stage:

I plan to have a fully natural (physiological) third stage, and to cut the cord only after the placenta is delivered. I want to allow the placenta to turn up in its own time. It is important that the cord is not clamped or cut until the placenta is delivered. Please do not administer any drugs unless you feel there is a real need. I would appreciate your advice to help me deliver the placenta naturally. **Please do not pull on the cord or use fundal pressure unless there is a specific indication to do so, as I have read that this is contra-indicated in drug-free third stages**.

If I give birth in the pool, I would like to stay in the water for the third stage.

Please offer my husband the opportunity to cut the cord if possible.

We do not wish to keep the placenta

Care of the baby:

I would like to breastfeed my baby as soon as possible after the birth

I would like to keep the baby unclothed and close to my skin immediately after birth, to maximise skin-to-skin contact

Please administer an injection of Vitamin K after the birth

Repair of the Perineum, if necessary

I would prefer to avoid having stitches if possible, so if you think any tear will heal of its own accord, without stitches, please let me know.

In case of transfer to hospital:

If transfer by ambulance becomes necessary, please do not strap me in on my back - I would prefer to be on my side, to make contractions easier to deal with

Please do not offer Pethidine/Demerol as I am concerned about its possible effect on my state of mind in labour, and on my baby’s health. I would prefer to have an epidural.

I agree to student doctors being present during my treatment

If a caesarean section becomes necessary, I would prefer to remain awake with epidural or spinal block anesthesia. I would like my partner to stay with me at all times, and would like to breastfeed the baby as soon after birth as possible.

If there are problems after the birth:

Please do not admit my baby to Special Care simply for observation, but only if there is a specific reason for concern.

Baby Feeding

Please do not give my baby supplements of glucose water or formula milk without my permission. I would expressly like to avoid having any formula supplements unless it is unavoidable, and certainly not in the first two days in any event.

Under no circumstances is my baby to be bottle-fed as this could lead to nipple confusion and hinder breastfeeding. If supplements are necessary, please give them by spoon or other method, not by bottle.

Going Home

I would like to go home as soon after the birth as I am able to move, unless I or the baby have health problems which require hospital treatment.

I would find it funny everytime someone in the hospital asked me when i was due, the short intake of breath would also be followed by “make sure you take some time to relax, get some rest” . I always felt the nurses seemed worried about me going into labour there and then. Seriously if it had of happened i would not of been delivering the baby where we stood talking - worse happened there is a maternity hospital just next to the main hospital (as in while not strictly the same building there is a short tunnel you can walk between so you don’t need to go outside) .

It was the take time to relax one that got me each time, ok yes the whole situation was VERY stressful . Mentally we could never switch off but as for letting my body relax - heck that was easy. Each day we would arrive at the hospital and spend hours sitting around doing nothing but reading and doing puzzles. A nice relaxed cooked lunch or dinner would take place as would finally getting home with Eilidh already sleeping and maybe a small bit of housework .
Anyone with young children will be able to tell you that spending the day with them cannot fall under the relaxing category at all. Tonight i am shattered, we have spent the day sorting clothes and playing (getting there stuff sorted and cleared out to make room for the baby) . This has taken all day and i think every part of my body is in some sort of pain .

One situation was “relaxing” the other was “chaotic and busy” , or i guess i could call the situations “boring” and ” entertaining and fulfilling ” .

Before Rebecca got ill all i wanted was a couple of days off, a few days to sit around and do nothing and not worry about housework . Now i think i have realized that when it comes down to it all i really want is to be home with my kids - even if im exhausted by the end of the day